Okay...if I gave birth to you or nursed for the first two years of your life you may not want to read any further....Yes, kids that's you! This post is not for you!
I am 50 now and learning fast that there are now rules, actually many rules you need to follow and 50 seems to be that magical cut off mark...and I am not liking it!
Don't get me wrong, I don't want to be that desperate woman in the room who still acts and dresses like she's 30 but some of these rules...are mostly just unsaid!
I was getting ready to turn off the TV, when Kathie Lee and some guy...I think named Kelly from What Not To Wear made "suggestions" for women over 50...this caught my attention and so I sat down and waited with my cup-of-joe.
While I waited...I thought about the changes my body has decided to completely do on it's own and the age spots that now even reside on my legs for God's sake!
I have a gained weight...I understand it may not be a lot of weight for some but it prevents me from wearing some of my clothes as they no longer fit and for me because I love clothes, this is like losing old friends, well toddlers really but still they are friends! I am coming to terms with all of this and my mantra has been I shall age gracefully...so this show was going to inform and enlighten me! But, this Kelly guy...his tone was a little condescending, like women over 50, maybe a little stupid as well, I think even Kathie Lee felt defensive. Let me say, there isn't a lot of role models...women who actually age and don't have plastic surgery! I have seen some actresses this fall season that I didn't even recognize...Anne Archer for one and Meg Ryan...What has she done to her lips?
So, according to Mr. Smarty pants...
1. No cleavage...ironically enough "the girls" just came in and I have to keep them under lock and key!
2. No shiny lipstick...spotlight those tiny lines around your mouth!
3. Longer dresses...50 year old knees shouldn't be seen!
4. My purse shouldn't match my shoes! Yeah, that's it...that was his advice!
5. The real killer...lower heels...I guess I could fall and break a hip!
I stopped my day for this earth shattering advice...that he dispensed so patiently to the disadvantaged Seniors of our world...Thanks!
Here's the thing...The Hubby and I are home alone with no children for the first time in over 20 years...and he would love me to dress like a Hootchie Mama! I ask, what's a 50 year old broad to do? I still like to dress nice and I love to dance...Do old people not do these things? I guess it hit me for the first time...50 might be old and yet I don't feel old at all!
Okay, kids you can uncover your eyes and ears now and come back into the room!