Monday, January 9, 2012

Color Me Shades of Gray

I am no longer a Floridian, no longer working and no longer warm. (Virginia is cooler than I remember.) I am also no longer a person who believes in blacks and whites ...it's not the colors or  the races that I am thinking of  but rather those absolutes of certainty that I had of my youth. I was recently  in a class where a young women of about 20 or so spoke her mind...I loved listening to her as she was so certain of her opinion, certain she was right...and I felt a mixture of envy and admiration, well, maybe admiration and THEN envy. I loved her excitement at knowing she was right.

I wonder if the more we color our hair to cover our gray the more we lose our ability to see only black and white issues...I wonder if that is where the gray creeps back into our lives. I wonder if I stop coloring my hair...will I be the woman who believes the absolutes of my youth again...like the young women I admired so much. For some reason  I keep thinking of the line from Billy Joel's song "...when I wore a younger man's clothes."

  No...I don't think that's it ...So, even though I color my gray hair...I want to keep my gray thinking these days...as people say they have earned their gray hair...I HAVE earned my gray thinking. I am happier NOT having all the answers and NOT judging everyone wrong or right. I don't know all the answers but I am not afraid to ask the questions and I am not afraid to say I don't know.  The Ronda who were the younger girl's clothes wasn't able to do that. Very freeing...but I am going to still color my gray hair for awhile longer!

11 comments:

Bob said...

That's the Ronda I know and love. Keep it up Babe!

Nichole said...

Glad you are blogging again! Can't wait to read more :)

Ronda's Rants said...

Thanks...a little rusty but ready to write as I am finding my voice again.

Rob Baer said...

Great thoughts mom! Glad to see you back on your blog. I'm starting to get gray in my beard!

Ronda's Rants said...

That makes me feel great Rob! My son has gray in his beard :) No matter what color your hair...you are handsome and smart!!! You take after your Mom :)

Betty said...

I took a double take when I saw your blog light up in my reader. So glad to see you blogging again. How have you been? I hope you are good and can´t wait to read more about your life.

Ronda's Rants said...

Thanks, Betty! I have been fine...lot's of changes...more blessings...I have two more grandchildren...doesn't get any better than that!

Pastor Tim said...

Nice to hear your "voice" again. Too much of the world is gray--not black and white. We need to embrace that inside our heads, if not on the outside :) Peace to you. . .

Diane Cayton-Hakey said...

YAY YOU! Glad to see an entry on your blog! Keep it up. :-))

Ronda's Rants said...

Thank you, Tim...Miss you all like crazy! Diane, I have moved into this beautiful but very different-from-what-I-am-used-to-place :)
I am a fish out of water on a mountain!

ADVERSE! said...

oh ronda.. so happy your back, so refreshing reading your blog. thank you for your post, means alot at not a so great time x leigh