The Perfect Little Pink Dress...

I have the perfect little pink dress, it is a pale pink with beautiful pink flowers along the hem line and while the tags say $198.00, that is NOT what I paid for it...I paid only $29.99, on sale at Talbot's. It was such a bargain, my perfect little pink dress. The palest of pink, the color my daughter describes as a shade that completely wipes all color from me making me appear corpse-like. The wonderful design of the dress, shows off not one of my  attributes but somehow hangs lifelessly on my body.

I have had the dress for over five years now and each and every time I pull it out of my closet, I marvel at my great find of only $29.99 and I ponder on when and where I might wear this perfect little pink dress...

Then I stop and remind myself , that my daughter, who doesn't lie much to her mother says it is an awful dress and that it is not in fact the perfect little pink dress! 

I have learned that shopping doesn't make you happy...not in the long run! It just really fills your closets with "things" and "things" do not make you happy.

Stop Talking and Listen to Others!

Dear...To no one in particular and everyone else:

My business is failing...we don't have any work. My company is allowed to fail by my government as I am clearly not "too big to fail"! I am not being political here although I am sure there are some who will take it politically because that is what this country does!
We have become a country of talking heads who never listen!
I would like someone to hear my pain...
My company, my family business is failing...Don't look away! Don't marginalize me with "Monday Night quarterbacking" ...I know there are many others like me. Don't send me your stupid email forwards with the analogy of "The Ants and The Grasshopper!"

I am not asking for money or even sympathy...I am asking that you hear me.

My business that my sons, my daughter, my husband and I have poured our hearts and soul into is over. Our dream, our American dream is done. The sadness sometimes washes over me and I cry...I know God has plans for us and we will move forward but allow me my sadness.

I once took a course on customer service training...and one statement that I have never forgotten...
People's perspective is their reality...their reality is their truth...even if it is not the truth...it is to them! They can not move forward until you hear them.

I am trying to make a new reality and a new truth for me.
I encourage everyone to stop talking and listen to others...Hear what they have to say!

From:
No one special.

Does This Outfit Make Me Look Racist?

Maybe...but I have to say wearing a flag on your butt does make it look big!
Also, the guy next to you looks like the punch line to
"You know you are redneck when..."

It would seem that some people object to former President Jimmy Carter stating that some of these people's anger comes from race rather than just plain old disappointment with our President.

I don't know if some people protesting are racist or not but I know all them aren't...most are just mad about what is "going on" and "they want to "take" their country back.
Now what they want to take it back to might be a concern to some folks! Especially to people like 80 year old southerners who remember what it used to be like. Would this frighten an 80 year old black citizen of this country who lived through our history?

I would like to point out that when I protested the war in Iraq and questioned why we were in the wrong country...as in "They-went-that-a-way Cowboy Bush!" And when I chanted "How are we going to pay for this George Bush?" I was called Un-American, aiding terrorists and anti-military! I was dressed in Jeans and a T-shirt and ...
yes...it made my butt look big too!

I Hate Texting!

I am about to show my age...all 51 years of it...I know this because when I shared my opinion on this topic to my daughter who is 26 years old...she said "You are showing your age!"

I hate Texting!
as in "Ronda send me a text with the information!"
I never learned to type having read that Jacqueline Kennedy said supposedly
"If you learn to type you become a typist!"
So...with this information I have sat waiting for my non-typing self to become the first lady!

So when asked to text information to someone this non-typing girl who was all thumbs to begin with can't use her thumbs to text...hence, I hate Texting!

I hate texting as in,
I am here and you are here...only you are hunched over a square box while you thumbs are moving at crazy rate of speed...making you look like some sort of evolutionary human being!
While I sit across from you looking like the missing link!

I do-not-like-greatly you sitting across from me Texting at a restaurant while I am forced to stare at wallpaper or make witty conversation with the waiter!

You Texting while with me...makes me feel there is a better party somewhere else and I haven't been invited!

When you are driving and Texting with me in your car....
Well, I don't have to type what I said...

Because I screamed it at 65 mph!

Texting is stupid....

They have this wonderful device and it is very near to what you are using right now...
Each individual has a number attached to their person...
you merely punch in these numbers (if your phone is super-fancy...you just speak my name)
and you will hear "Hello!"

And wonders of wonders...
It is like the person is sitting next to you!

OH WAIT... I AM SITTING NEXT TO YOU!

Tourists Come in All Sizes, Shapes and Shades of Red

I love to people watch and recently while at Disney...while all others in my party risked life and limb on a roller coaster ride...I had the opportunity!
We in Florida love our tourists...really...and if anyone here ever gives you the impression otherwise, you remind them it's because of you that we don't have a state income tax!

So...it is with love in my heart that I offer these observations...

For the love of God and all that is holy please put some clothes on those pale translucent white limbs and some sun block... say like 100 spf. Your bright red tender flesh reminds me how quickly shrimp cook in a fry pan!

Some fashion advice...even a 51 year old grandmother (me) knows you do not wear white or brown socks with flip flops...I mean really...I don't know how you say "Dork" in France but we here in Florida have a mental picture of you now to put in our dictionary.

Also...when your small child says..."Mom, I think I am going to be sick..." you have maybe, at most three seconds to get ready for vomit!
I must say Miss woman from New York...you don't seem to know the meaning of a New York Minute...but your small daughter does!

And...lady talking on your cell phone about your grandchildren and your daughter-in-law...I almost slapped you! (again, with only love-in-my-heart)
With everyone listening because you have a big and insensitive mouth you disparaged your grandchildren aged 11 and 13 by saying they are ungrateful brats because their mother hasn't taught them any better... I wondered what you have taught them!

To the older couple who sat with their disabled daughter in the wheel chair while she cooed like a baby...I saw you watching other people as I watched you...I know you felt badly about envying others. I hope my speaking to your daughter and she cooing to me made it a little easier.Thank you for sharing that it was her fourth birthday...I saw the tears well up in both your eyes when I said she was beautiful and she is...and so are both of you! I treasure this memory.

I saw much more...

Michael Jackson is Still Dead...

I am so tired of the Michael Jackson coverage that I am turning off all media in my car and home...this is just surreal to me. It has made me consider how our news coverage has become...not NEWS! Before, turning off Good Morning America...I heard that ABC is running three Michael Jackson specials today! CNN is just as bad.
I have wanted information on Tegucigalpa and I haven't been able to get very much at all.
But, Lord help me, I have heard every thought imaginable about Michael Jackson.


RIP Michael Jackson...but today I would like some peace from all the people trying to make money off of your corpse!

May you have a peaceful day and enjoy your blessings!
God bless the people of Honduras and keep them in your care.

Truly Inspiring...Now Get Out There and Sell Those Credit Cards!

I keep waiting for the laughs that never come!!

There Are No Words!

That's my girl! For more Wordless Wednesdays visit 5 Minutes for Mom

I Am Sleeping with the Enemy...

Yes, I am sleeping with the enemy...
He pretends to support me but nooooooooo....The foods he brought into this house to entice me to forget and succumb to the dark and less healthy albeit... happy side!
He nods dutifully, so convincingly when I say I want to lose these 10 pounds...yes I have gained back the 4 pounds I misplaced!
This long holiday weekend was only an excuse to fatten me up like a holiday turkey!
We have done things...
Things, I am too ashamed to even talk about...
Over the weekend, each time Valerie Bertinelli or Marie Osmand came on the TV, selling their miracle foods...I hung my head and cried!
I am a grown woman who literally is afraid to get on the scale...Not gonna do it!
Today is a new day, I may have lost the battle but I will win the war...
or die on the battlefield!

***I remembered also helping my Granny out of the hospital bed when she was there and she complained about how big her thighs were! I thought...Dear God! When I am 91...can I please make peace with my thighs!

I Am So Going to Get a Big Head!

I have received another award and I have spent the last ten minutes doing my best celebration dance! It is a cross between a rain dance and a pee pee dance! A sight to behold...I tell you!


Jill at Jill Jill bo Bill has further increased the circumference of my noggin' by giving me this swell award!
Thank you...and a shout out to all my peeps who made this possible!
(I want you to know that my adult children think I have lost my mind...but I am happy and who am I hurting...it's not like Momma's on crack, right?)

I am passing this award on to seven people whose blogs I love!
Gina at Lattes&Lipsticks
Brenda at Queen of Good Intentions
LoLo at The Simple Things
Karla at Zander & Me
Beth Ann at TeamThornhill
Teri at Let me think on it
Lisa at JujuBoo
Celebrate anyway you wish...you may dance the dance of your own choosing but here are your instructions.
1. The winner can put the logo on her/his blog
2. Link the person you received your award from.
3. Nominate 7 other blogs.
4. Put links of those blogs on yours.
5. Leave a message on the blogs of those you’ve nominated

I am opening the envelope and the winners are...

So...I as I was saying Lisa from JujuBoo gave me an award. It is not for the "biggest ass..." I read it wrong, it is The Kick Ass Blogger Award...a much nicer award... for sure!

Here are the rules:

1. Choose 5 bloggers that you feel are "Kick Ass Bloggers"

2. Let them know in your post or via email or blog comments that they have received an award.

3. Share the love and link back to both the person who awarded you and back to http://www.mammadawg.com/

4. Hop on back to the Kick Ass Blogger Club HQ to sign Mr. Linky then pass it on!

My Fab Five are...

Rhonda at A day in Rhonda's Life because she is so dang cool!

Nic at My Family and Other Animals because she uses words like OHHOLYMOTHEROFGODANDALLTHEBIGGYSAINTPEOPLE!

Kendra at Nest Half Empty because I seem to relate to all she writes about.

Jennifer at The Fun House because it IS always FUN at her house! and last but not least...

Blogstalker at The Blogstalker

I really enjoy this blog...just a lot of random stuff from a stalker type! I mean what's not to enjoy!

Make my Momma Proud

I apparently have a bar stool named after me!

Ronda Bar Stool

I also started a new blog for Travel called ....Travel with Ronda...it is not quite as exciting as that bar stool but I am working on it!