Back to the Future

     I left my job May 13, 2011 and on May 19th I got in my car and drove to the small town in Virginia where my husband was already living and working. He and I had  begun our marriage there ...almost 34 years ago and now I was returning. My car looked nothing like a DeLorean and I, nothing like Marty McFly but Back to the Future is where I landed. When my Hubby and I first arrived in this town, we were young newlyweds and we thought sincerely this was where we would live and breed. When I did unexpectedly become "An Expectant Mother"...and that sweet baby arrived all those ideas changed! I wanted to be in Florida, where my family was and still is... and I wanted "that" life. My Hubby wanted ME...so, he went along with my decision. Because he did that for me ...I felt like it was important to support him now in his decision to  accept a job in Virginia and build on land that has been in his family for many years. We have left all of our grown children, their children, my parents,siblings, grandmother and a church family that we felt blessed to be a part of...to start a new life. That life, this new life seems so much like "The Life we might have had..."
     Everywhere I look I see the past...buildings are the same, businesses are the same...even the land, we left seemed to quietly wait our return! Everything is different and yet, the same. We first arrived as Newyweds and now return Empty Nesters. In the places we visit we see our young lives beginning ...except the mirror... it is  there we see that we have already had our beginning. Everything is different and yet, the same! That image in the mirror asks question after question..."Did we make the right decison in leaving?" "Did we make the right decison in returning?" "Did we make the most of our time away?" "Will we make the most of our return?"  So far, the image hasn't any answers...just a reflection of hope for our plans for our Future!

33 years ago, this Friday...I Married a Really Cute Guy!

This is my favorite picture ever taken of me, including my wedding day... I frankly, rocked that dress! I love the way my husband looks, I love the expression he is making, our youngest son makes the exact same modest smile. The picture was taken at our daughter's wedding and the next day we flew to California and stayed at the Ritz Carlton to celebrate our anniversary.

That was a pretty good day! I WOULD like to have that day over and over!

I have so many things I NEED to blog about but I haven't...so odd that I would use such a public forum to maintain my sanity and clearly if you look at the frequency of my current blogging you would wonder about my mental state. Big changes have been made in my life and still bigger ones to come...

I am currently taking my life on a minute by minute basis... I don't think  that means I am doing badly because for a woman who likes to plan her life down to what she will wear two weeks from now...I am making great strides in just "not knowing" what the future holds for me.

All that I know, really know is that man will be with me! Happy Anniversary, honey...see you then!

We Are Like Two Peas in a Pod...Only One is a Bean!

Recently I told someone my Hubby was my best friend and he is...that has not always been the case. We started out as friends but as marriages, sometimes do... we got busy and became acquaintances! Working, raising children and even our church would become a distraction that kept us from feeling like friends.

Both of us are very tolerate of other people and each of us have friends who think very differently that we do; it took a long time for us to allow that with each other. It took us even longer to realize that married people don't have to have the same mind ... it's okay to disagree and be different.

I have wonderful friends, in fact if you were to judge me just on my friends alone, I think, I would be judged a success. My friends are varied, Christian, Atheists, Hindus and I think I have one who classifies herself as Pagan but I think she's joking and really  she's agnostic. Some of my friends are conservatives and believe it or not they love me in spite of my liberalism. I have one friend who is a conservative Nudist and while I am neither, I love him just the same and I know he would do anything for me or my family. My husband is probably more accepting than even I am, however, for years we struggled to accept each other for just who we are and remember that we fell in love with each others differences. 

It's funny how we all strive to accept our neighbor but we needle our spouses for their shortcomings! God gave me a patient man who forgives easily...and I am grateful.
That's the great thing about getting older...what's essential is more clear to you everyday!

I Am Glad He is Not Sorry He Married Me!

I have made my blog public again after a falling out with a fellow blogger...I have enabled comment moderation and while I hate it...I hate her comments more! :)
I am sorry if anything I have written ever offends as it is never my intention. I am just sharing my opinions and you know what they say about opinions...


Early in our marriage...My Hubby and I discovered that, he did not like, understand or know how to make or even fake an apology. This became a problem as mystery of all mysteries I needed one to get over whatever happened. We will define "get over" as anything that prevented me from pretending there was not anything wrong...I should also suggest here I am not good at faking or pretending. It was a difficult time for both of us.

My husband has learned to give "good apologies" since this time in fact he is better at giving a sincere apology than anyone I know. When I am sorry...I truly try to give the apology in the manner my Hubby has shown me.

First...
Do not say I am sorry you got your feelings hurt!
This is like saying "I am sorry you were run over by a car!" while you were the driver of the car!

Second...
Don't apologize unless you are.
This is when you say "I am sorry but ...you started it! "

Third...
Don't apologize and then continue doing the behavior.
"I am sorry you were run over by the car!" Now stand here while I get back into the car and hit you again.

To apologize you say "I am sorry that "whatever happened" occurred and I admit "my responsibility" and I hope you accept my apology as I will not let this happen again."

It is okay to say it was unintentional but to say to someone " You shouldn't feel whatever you are feeling"... is not okay!

You accept apology and you should!! ... (in a perfect world)

Maybe, like My Hubby you are married to someone like me who wants to revisit said injury.
He patiently listens and says while smiling..."And, I am still sorry for all of that!"

I can't think of anyone who could still be angry with a person like that... Well, I can but he loves me anyway!!!

I do love you Bob!!

This and That

My Hubby and I are old. Getting older by the minute, in fact there are times when we are together that I begin to wonder what we will be like as ancient people.

Scene:
Two people home alone.
Sitting at two desks.
On two separate computers.
at least one of the two are having a conversation, the people not the computers.

Wife: "Do we have plans for next week?"

Hubby: "Some...I need to mow the lawn!"

Wife: "Can we go to Disney?"

Hubby: "Sure...How about Saturday?"

P A U S E (I mean just that long of a pause...not any longer I promise)

Wife: "How about we go during the week? There will be less people there."

(The sound of silence....crickets...birds chirping....car drives by...more silence...a dog barks in the distance...that kind of silence)

Wife: "Hubby.."

Hubby: "What?"

Wife: Just staring.

Hubby: "Are you talking to me?"

Wife: "Do you see anyone else here?"

Hubby: "What?"

Wife: "Never mind..."

A younger woman would have fought over this or at least this woman when younger would have fought over this! But not anymore...
Maybe we will make it to Disney next week.

He's All Wet!

Hubby took this picture on Soppy wet Disney Day (aka My Birthday) he thought it was artistic...
Yeah...well, I love him, anyway! No special lens ... just a wet camera, wet camera man and a wet day! Happy Wordful Wednesday visit Angie at Seven Clown Circus for more artistic pictures!

Disney on....Rain!

We went to Disney for my Birthday...if you go to Disney.com and register you receive a certificate for one free pass on your actual birthday. Well, this year my birthday fell on the rainiest- day-of-the-year! But...I had fun...I went to the Haunted Mansion...still haunted! I went to Pirates of the Caribbean...and now Jack Sparrow is there...really cute! I saw a parade...my favorite and had lunch with a cute guy...not Mickey...my Hubby!
It was a great, soppy wet day!





Visit Cute Candid Carrie for more friday fotos

Have a great weekend!

Doctor's Orders ...Take a Laugh!

I think the importance of a sense of humor in life shouldn't be underestimated...seriously!
My Hubby has many qualities that I find sexy and endearing but he has a great sense of humor.
Someone who has the ability to make others laugh in a stressful time is so important. I have many of those people in my life...I married that kind of guy...granted a good deal of the stress I am under he has provided but he does make me laugh all the time! Most of my friends make me laugh and all of my children and their spouses have a great sense of humor! We like funny people which this story does not indicate at all... other than to suggest we were very tired!

Last evening...Hubby had a meeting to go to and I was not invited nor did I want to attend but I did make the drive back to St. Augustine with him...a three hour tour.
So...he suggested places to drop me off and I decided I wanted to go to Marshall's which even though they have very low prices (they do and no...I am not getting paid to say this) ...My Hubby was worried about me spending too much money!

So...as I am getting out of the car..
He says " Remember we are Broke..." and as I turn to look at him...thinking "Yeah...that was going to slip my mind"...he adds...
"...Back Mountain!"
I know he's cheesy but I can't believe he said it and I start laughing...
"I don't think that means what you think it means! I say
and "Not that there's anything wrong with that!"
I tell him adding..."I think you may want to see the movie before you tell people we are indeed Broke Back Mountain..."

So...we will never be on the comedy circuit but
"Who makes you laugh?"

10 Things I Hate About You

****This was a post I was never going to "hit publish post" for...but I mentioned it on a bloggy friend's blog and she suggested I should publish it and since...I am in an argument with my Hubby I decided to "hit publish post!"
I was frustrated with my Hubby to the point of planning his demise and how to dispose of his remains when I reminded myself of two things...I am not a good liar and my brother is a homicide detective for the county I live in...

Brother: "Ronda, where is your husband?"
Ronda: "He is in the backyard...under the azaleas!"

Seriously...The plot of the next Lifetime movie!

My second thought was to lacerate (nice ten dollar word) him on my blog but...my kids read my blog and frankly My Hubby would possibly strike back with his own blog....Bob's Bitchin' ( sorry Mom!)
anyway...I decided to turn my frustrations inward and this is the post! The things I hate are about myself... I don't really "hate" these things...I am merely not fond of them but I liked the title of the post...so I left it!
My point is there are two sides to every argument...and while I am tempted to say My side and the wrong side...it wouldn't be true!****

1. I hate that you follow rules to the letter...that if you don't know them you look them up! You are the rule keeper, the rule reminder and you let everyone know if they broke the rules!
2. I hate that everything is a "big deal" to you...it would seem there are no small problems...only large ones!
3. I hate that you are so insecure... At what age are you secure about who you are as a person?
4. I hate that you keep and maintain a record of wrongdoings...you know it's wrong and yet you do it!!
5. I hate that you don't trust others. You may feel you have good reason but it effects all your relationships adversely!
6. I hate that you swear...it doesn't make you clever or bold...it shows how weak you feel.
7. I hate that you are afraid of change...nothing remains the same and change is normal.
8. I hate that you are so sensitive...let things roll off your back more often!
9. I hate that you always feel you need to defend the "underdog"...it makes others feel like you think yourself superior to them.
10. I hate that you would actually argue with a brick wall!

Dreams of Jennifer and Brad and Angelina... OH MY!

So...I loved the Oscars...I mean sitting-there-in-my-chair-staring- at- the- TV-loved-the-Oscars!
I loved all of it and fell asleep exhausted thinking about how there was really only one uncomfortable moment...
I felt badly for Jennifer Aniston that she had to present with Jack Black ( Nice, but why couldn't it have been someone like the new James Bond, Daniel Craig?) in front of her ex-husband and his new "wife" and mother of his half dozen kids!
I fell asleep thinking ...."Why did they have to put the camera on the happy couple while she was talking?" It was the icky feeling...

My Hubby woke me up really early and I was dreaming and in my dream...

I was Brad Pitt's ex-wife and I had to speak in front of a lot of people including him and his "new wife!"

"Honey... I am going!" he said
I open my eyes and see My Hubby and I am overjoyed that HE is my Hubby and I am NOT the ex-wife of Brad Pitt...I swear this is my actual thought process...which I apparently express out loud!
Hubby clearly confused!
So...I do what rational people do...I explain.
"You, see I was dreaming I was Brad Pitt's ex-wife and I had to talk in front of a lot of people, including him and his "new wife!"
"I am so glad you are my Hubby!" I say.
Hubby responds with comment that will live in Ronda's Infamy (actual place you don't want to go there)

"But Ronda, if you were Brad Pitt's ex-wife we would be RICH!" Hubby says.
"Yes...but then I would be Jennifer Aniston..." I say through clenched teeth!
"Oh...yea..." Hubby smiles.
Neither one of us have figured in the "John Mayor" factor!

Don't forget to Vote for Sara and enter the drawing for the iPod nano on February 27!
Good Luck!

It's Just A Number and There is Only 24 Hours to a Day!

This is a post that really won't interest most guys...and may offend some girls but it's my blog and my rant! I have issues with my weight...all my life! I am uncertain how it started and I am tired of wondering at this point...at 50, I want to accept my body, make it strong and not be self -conscious anymore! I was very small almost my whole life...I am not small anymore and I have struggled greatly with this occurrence! I think many women look at me and think that I should just "shut it" about my weight gain and recently I have started to agree. Life is too short and too important to worry about a size! Even if I am now an odd size...I am a (S)Medium ...Haven't heard of that size? No...neither has any of the stores! But none-the-less that is my size! I have little bitty shoulders and a small waist...that's the (S) and big boobs and butt that's the Medium! I bitch and complain and My Hubby is always patient but perplexed by what the big problem is! My friend, Karyn sent me this picture and I finally understand something!!!
Real Men don't care what we look like...they care that we are healthy and happy! I love Pierce Brosnan and Keely Brosnan is my hero!

Here is Mr Brosnan getting caught in a compromising photo...with his wife!!!

I was opening this email when the Hubby walked in...I called him over!

"Okay, I am going to ask you straight out... Is she fat? I asked with that look he dreads...that "this is a test look...for the next sixty seconds..."

He looked like a deer caught in the head lights of a semi-truck!

"Ronda" ...he starts cautiously as if handling nitroglycerin...

"She has an Hour glass shape!" he smiled as if he had hit the ball out of the park.

"That man loves his wife as I love you and she has an hour glass shape!"

Then my Hubby smiled the smile that I fell in love with and said while leaving the room...

"She has a 24 hour glass shape!"

I love my Hubby but...

Mr. Pierce Brosnan will always be my favorite Bond...James Bond!

It's Time to Buy Girl Scout Cookies!

So...I was sitting at the desk in the office, still cursing blogger when the door bell rang.
Lickety split, the sweet dog we adopted turned into the Hound from Hell, running and throwing herself at front door to protect her meal tickets from ringing door bell which only I and said dog can hear! (Whew...out of breath...run on sentence!)
But...Hubby can hear Hound from Hell though...
I stay, bottom firmly planted to my chair, while Hubby answers door.
He says..."It's a girl scout!"
I, who have not eaten anything fun in weeks, weak from fighting off brownies and sore from Pilates answer " Tell Satan's Spawn to move along!"
To which my husband answers his usual answer..."WWWWWHHHHHAAAAATTTTT?
So like a person who is weak from hunger and lacking any God given sense...I yell
"Tell Satan's Spawn to move along!" just as my Hubby is opening the door.

Little girl scout couldn't decide if she was more afraid of actual Hound of Hell in front of her or Unimaginable Scary Lady in the other room!
Hubby takes forever telling her "No, thanks!" because... he wasn't telling her "No, thanks!"
It would seem sweet girl scout's father was standing right beside his sweet daughter and he wasn't amused by me at all! So, My Hubby being of good sound diplomatic mind bought two boxes!!!

Two boxes that I will eat...I am sure!
However, I might get to keep living in the neighborhood!

Sometime's God says NO!

My husband has a file on the computer labeled Plant House and in that file contains these pictures...I call it the "porn file!"

When he has a spare moment he looks at this file and says a silent prayer that God will work it out that he can have this house!

I know what you thinking..."THIS HOUSE! THIS HOUSE THAT LOOKS LIKE A CRACK HOUSE!"

Yes...this house!

This home was built in 1915 and refurbished...unfortunately the couple gave birth to a son who would eventually leave a pot on the stove and burn his parents house down!

You thought you were having a bad day!

We did make an offer on this house and the fine gentleman turned us down and wouldn't move off his price!

I thank God everyday that he did not
but my poor Hubby prays that God will make a way!

So he continues to dream and pray that we will have the opportunity to remodel this house!

I continue to thank my Lord and Savior we will not have that opportunity!!!

For more Wordful Wednesdays visit Angie!

Happy New Year Hubby!

My Hubby is the Greatest and I don't tell him that enough...

First...he loves his children and grandchildren and would do anything for them.

Second...He can fix anything...I mean anything...I love a handy man!

Third...He is kind to everyone...never an unkind thought or deed!

Fourth...he loves me...I don't know why but he does and I am grateful!

Fifth...He takes almost all of our pictures...I complain...about how they look but I always forget to pick up the camera...he gets the shot...I love that he hasn't told me to shove it!

Sixth... Not every man could pull off those slippers but my guy can!

Happy New year to all... especially My Honey!

Can You Say Double Standard?

So...the other night..The Hubby and I watch Casino Royale...I know we are a little late to the party! I liked Peirce Brosnan in the role of 007...I liked that he was a suave 007 who seemed to have a sense of humor and I wasn't ready for him to leave the role. I don't think he cared as much as I did. Anyway, Hubby didn't suggest going to see it and I boycotted it the same way I did Mr. and Mrs. Smith...yes, I know I am insane!

Back to Casino Royale...My daughter and Her Hubby bought it and lent it to us to watch...Hubby is quiet and so am I...

It starts off really violent but y'know what's a murder or two in the first few seconds of a movie and then real soon there is a roll- in- the- hay ..I know I sound like my mother...I now have her arms too!

Hubby is still quiet...I think he has gone to sleep...but it gets bright at one point and I see he is indeed awake... just really quiet!

So we get to the "Halle Berry" shot only it's Daniel Craig coming out of the water in his little swim suit and I hear this loud sighing sound like someone letting the air out of a tire...

It's Hubby...

"What's wrong?" I say.

"Oh...nothing!" he says. I have this feeling we have done this before but the roles are not quite right...something is different!

Then the big torture scene...

I am a little confused at this point but I see this guy kicking the cane bottom out of a chair and then...the next scene Daniel Craig is naked...naked!

So...I am still confused and I say out loud to Hubby..."Is he naked?" (I am thinking that would be torture to me...Take all your clothes off while we make fun of you!)

"Of course he is naked!!" Hubby snaps and seems all mad at me!

"Well, I didn't tell him to take all his clothes off!" I snap back!

All...I can think of is all the dumb movies I have watched over the years ...where girls are being chased and as they run their clothes fall off and all the other preposterous ways women end up naked in films....I mean years of this dumb stuff!

So...My Hubby doesn't care for this stuff any more than I do! I will be interested if he takes me to see the new Daniel Craig movie!

Happy Birthday Bob!!!!

Happy 51st Birthday, honey...I hope your day is special...because you deserve it for all the wonderful things you do for us all!!! I love you!

Let's ditch work and do something FUN!

Why Can't We Be Friends?

As I said yesterday...I have met a woman who is Muslim and have attempted to form a relationship with her of some kind.
I had read the book The Faith Club and it inspired me to want to have that kind of relationship with women of different faiths. I have never had friends other than Christians and I want to have friends of different faith backgrounds.
I knew I lived near a local Mosque but I don't know anyone who is Muslim...so several weeks ago a man walked by me in the grocery store...he looked like Jesus. I mean the way he dressed and wore sandals...he was Muslim and while the Hubby stood beside me I told this man about the book that I had read and that I had hoped to meet two women of different faiths than mine. I asked him if he knew of a woman who wouldn't mind me asking her questions about Islam. He turned out to be the Imam of that local Mosque and he said his wife would be glad to speak with me and I gave him my phone number and he gave me hers. One week later...she and I met at her home.
My Hubby and I had gone to a reception that day and it had run longer than we had expected. So, because of the late time and the fact that I didn't want to be late to meet her...we came straight from our previous engagement. That would mean My Hubby would drop me off and then he would need to pick me up. We met the Imam outside his apartment building and I told My Hubby that I shouldn't be later than a half of an hour! He watched me walk away with the Imam. Boy was that sentence a mistake! Turns out during the reception My Hubby had turned my cell phone ringer off...and I was not a half of an hour instead more like two hours!
My poor Hubby called me four times...while thinking of me sitting in a chair with a bag pulled over my head and a video camera taping me! He went over and over in his head what he was going to tell my brother the cop!
It is so funny to me now...but he really was worried and then ashamed that his imagination was terrifying him and then scared for me. All that completely went away when he saw me and then it turned to "I am so mad at you Ronda... I am going to kill you!" He felt a little sorry when I said I did not know my phone had been turned off!

I haven't talked about this in the blog because I just don't know what to feel about it yet....I spent two wonderful hours speaking with this woman about her faith and I was thrilled she was so patient...we have exchanged emails. She explained in great detail the five pillars of Islam and the importance of Mecca. She was very patient and kind. I was so excited and hoped she and I would be great friends! However, my feeling now is that she probably isn't interested in a friendship but rather in giving me the information to prevent me from spending an eternity in hell...which don't get me wrong I am grateful for but I really do think I am okay!
She never seemed offended when I asked questions ...and as I said she was very patient! I was very impressed with her faith. She has emailed me and asked that we meet so she can return the book (a copy of The Faith Club) ... I am disappointed because I don't think it will go further.
I haven't any feelings of judgement for her however I have felt a little judged by her at times!
My hopes in going to the Mosque (which was not the Mosque that they attend) was that I would learn more and I did. It was an open house to learn more about Islam...I thought that sounded perfect! It just wasn't the best of experiences...more about that tomorrow!

WHAT????

It's just the Hubby and I... and two dogs and two cats left at home. Sometimes, I wonder what a person hiding in the closet would think of us...
Okay, I don't think of this often... because that would just be paranoid but... sometimes I do wonder!

We are aging and starting to show visible signs of aging. Well, I can't actually see the signs... because nine times out of ten...I can't find my glasses! My memory is gone... What was I talking about? Oh..yeah!
My Hubby's hearing is nearly gone...I used to think it was selective hearing until that time in the car...
We were on a romantic drive, just the two of us...when something caught my eye out the window...I can't even remember what it was... ( remember...my memory is gone!) So...I looked at my sweetie and said "Wow, what do you think that was about?" My Hubby looked at me strangely, paused and shrugged his shoulders and then stuck his tongue out!
"Why on earth did you do that?" I said.
He replied "Didn't you say...Stick you tongue out?"
"No! Why would I say that?"
"I don't know...Why did you?"
"I didn't!"
That story had slipped from my mind until a couple of days ago...

The Hubby was in the kitchen reading the paper...silently cursing me for blogging...I am sure, when I was trying to leave a comment for Rhonda about Niagara...it looked like it was spelled wrong...so I yell across the house to the kitchen...
"How do you spell Niagara?"
He answers back "Why do you want to spell Viagra?"
"I don't" I yell..."I want to spell Niagara"
"I...heard...what ...you... said... Why...do...you...want ...to ...spell...Viagra? He said slowly!
"I... don't!" I yell back just as slowly!
He stomps down the hallway..."Why...do...you...want...to... spell ...Viagra?
" I don't" I say..."I want to spell Niagara!"
"Oh...N-i-a-g-r-a"
So...he told me wrong... and that's why I misspelled Niagara on Rhonda's blog!

I Would Think About it... But, it Hurts!

We are in her office and she is gushing over everything he says and I am thinking seriously...
She is laughing over everything he is saying and I smile uncomfortably... she tells me he is a genius and I think uh-huh!
He is starting to lean towards her to whisper something and I can feel my stomach tightening and then she rests her hand on his arm and starts playing with MY HUSBAND'S shirt sleeve and I start screaming at her and... I... wake... up!!!

I have held a grudge all day against the Hubby about this stupid dream...I am trying not to...I know it's silly but it seemed so real. He has called me today numerous times to ask me business related questions, (I mean we have a business together) and I have snapped at him! I think I am insane and he knows I am insane...but there you have it...he misbehaved in a imaginary Realtor's office and I am mad!

That's what I have been Thinkin' about today on Thursday!

Also, my GIVEAWAY and how funny Candid Carrie is...I mean really funny! Please click on the Giveaway and enter for cool stuff from The Bonnie Hunt Show
Also, read about my trip to see her show at Travel with Ronda AKA Ronda's Rants on the Run!!!

We're Back....from The Bonnie Hunt Show!

Okay, Here's Proof we were at the Bonnie Hunt Show but...you have to look fast when they pan to the audience... I am wearing a purple shirt and The Hubby is wearing green! Look Fast or you will miss us!
The Bonnie Hunt Show Clip

We had a wonderful time and The Hubby was even telling the kids how much fun it was to watch the show! This is today's show and we stayed for Monday's taping which was also taped on Thursday.